my journey through the pursuit of love & happiness

Archive for February 2011

“The minute I heard my first love story,I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere, they’re in each other all along.” -Rumi (Persian poet)

Resume sex at your own risk.

I just had resume sex.

Graduate school is about to end. Bittersweet. Yes I want school to be over, but all the effort of getting a job and facing the prospect of having to settle for a less-than-perfect job is so very bitter.

Which brings me to the title of this blog. Resume sex. Yes. Resume. Sex.

I needed to craft a CV for some jobs. Resume I have, CV I do not. Yes, there is a difference, and if someone asks you specifically for a CV send them a CV.

I decided to send my CV draft to a friend who is really good at editing. After I sent it to him I told him sharing your CV/resume with someone is very intimate, like someone has just seen you naked.

You spend so much time working on your resume and you feel a great sense of accomplishment when it’s finished and sent it off.

It doesn’t feel as intimate when you send it off, though. It’s more like a one-night stand. Someone is going to be touching your resume and you are going to stand there, you hope they remember something good, mostly, you just don’t want to look bad in front of them, but comfort yourself because you know you’ll never see them again.

As my friend noted, the climax of sending it felt good but you’ll probably never hear back and they probably didn’t get as much out from receiving as you did from giving.

Maybe now all the men out there will realize what it’s like to a be a woman in bed with a bad sex partner? On second thoughts, I’ll probably get my dream job before three men realize that’s true.

“I feel I’m in the middle of an awful dream. Yet I know it can’t be a dream because there are no boy dancers.” Blanche, Golden Girls

Am I thinking sex or broccoli?

Am I thinking sex or broccoli?

First, let me preface this by saying I LOVE animals. If I saw one being mistreated I would walk up and punch someone in the face for doing so. That being said, I also don’t like dumb people.

I am really getting tired of PETA’s low-brow sex tactics at convincing people to go vegetarian. What’s next? Miller lite ads with butt-ass naked women with big hair saying ‘I’d rather go lite’? (I should’ve gone into advertising).

First of all I know a lot of vegetarians and they are not stick thin. They are normal people, like the rest of us meat-eating population. Second, I also know people who went vegetarian and didn’t do it the healthy way and suffered because they weren’t getting all the nutrients and vitamins their body needs.

What bothers me about Peta’s ads:

1. Peta’s sex tactics really only appeal to straight men. Do you think looking at a picture of a woman with a cucumber in her mouth suggestively is really going to get me to eat veggies? Really you are just giving the teenage neighborhood boy masturbation material.

2. Guess who does the shopping in most families? Did you say women?  You only have to  look  to your household to see who makes the grocery shopping/health decisions. So why aren’t you targeting women?

3. It’s a stupid argument. Do they think they are really convincing people that if they eat more veggies (and no meat) they are going to have more (and better) sex and be better looking? Seriously?!

Is there nothing to their benefit that they have to go soooo shallow?! Do they really think their message isn’t getting lost in sex?

In the end, I can complain all I want but the econometrician in me decided to do a little bit more research and try to put some weight to my and Peta’s claims. Here’s what I found online.

Why vegetarians aren’t having better sex, but thank you PETA for manipulating data to your benefit. I am really starting to respect you as an organization.

After having their Superbowl ad banned Peta released a statement in response to NBC. In this statement Peta said that meat makes people “fat, sick and boring in bed.” That sounds scientific to me! Their sample of people was limited to people who ate low-fat, low-cholesterol diets. Further, vegetarians who are slimmer tend to be slimmer because they are more health-conscious overall. In other words, not eating meat isn’t a causal factor to being slim.

Being over weight has it’s consequences, yes. It is related to diabetes, heart disease and decreased sex libido, sure. But not everyone who eats meat is overweight. And certainly, eating meat is not a casual factor for being fat. In fact, eat fat is a casual relationship with being fat. Who knew?

But wait… this just in. A recent study shows that weight loss does not positively affect a woman’s sex life. In fact, researches “showed that overweight women were more likely to report having sexual intercourse with a man, even when she controlled for age, race and type of residence.” (I’m not sure what they mean by type of residence, but I like this demographic control. Note: This study talked about weight, not vegetarian diet). Wha? Admittingly, the researches said these results were unexpected. The researches went on to say that “the important part to take away from the study is that physicians and others who work in women’s medical health should never make assumptions about sexual behavior based on outward appearances.”

Vitamin deficiencies can plague vegetarians. In fact, “vegetarian women are also more likely to develop amenorrhea (loss of periods), a condition that’s usually accompanied by low testosterone, vaginal dryness, and poor libido.”

Further, “data suggest that the health of Western vegetarians is good and similar to that of comparable non-vegetarians.”

So what’s with all the sex?

My only conclusion is that there is actually little benefits from being a vegetarian — or else they would be using these great arguments instead of distracting people with sex. I mean they put more sex in their ads than Budweiser!

I guess presenting meat-eating as a moral delimna is no longer in fashion. Or maybe Peta is underestimating the population. Why not have ads of vegetarians describing their vegetarian experiences? Like when they switched, how it’s been hard and benefits they personally feel they can attribute to the switch?

Peta, I cannot take you seriously when you are only creating masturbation material for the neighborhood teen (and prolly married men) and not once ever attempting to create an ad that encourages me to question my meat-eating choices.

Found this after I wrote my post. Sums it up pretty nicely.

Found this after I wrote my post. Sums it up pretty nicely.


This was the poem that was read at Chelsea Clinton’s wedding. Reading it leaves me with that humbling feeling of love and I think it is a very beautiful expression of amor.

The author wrote the poem after the death of his girlfriend. “I transmitted a message to her which I had failed to deliver when I’d had the chance,” said the author in his 1998 memoir.

I think that point makes it all the more beautiful to read at a wedding ceremony.

The daily routine of life can blind us to the opportunities and chances to show and express love.

Here is to love making all of our lives more enriched and worthy.

The life that I have by Leo Marks

The life that I have
Is all that I have
And the life that I have
Is yours

The love that I have
Of the life that I have
Is yours and yours and yours.

A sleep I shall have
A rest I shall have
Yet death will be but a pause
For the peace of my years
In the long green grass
Will be yours and yours and yours.

That's amore.

“What is love? Love is when one person knows all of your secrets… your deepest, darkest, most dreadful secrets of which no one else in the world knows… and yet in the end, that one person does not think any less of you; even if the rest of the world does.” —Joss Whedon

Homemade brown sugar scrub. So easy to make and great for the skin!

Since I love making things from scratch and I highly dislike big prices I decided to finally make my own body scrub.

After searching online I have come up with my own recipe:

1/3 Turbinado brown sugar

1 tablespoon coffee grinds

1/3 cup almond glow brand coconut skin oil (you want one part oil, one part salt/sugar, this helps it be more of a polish than a scrub. do a 1/2 ratio of oil if you want more of a rough scrub but I think with the sugar I used a 1:1 ratio worked great, the sugar absorbed up all the oil and there wasn’t any left soaking at the bottom. Also make sure you get a body oil that already has Vitamin E in it)

a few drops of vanilla

1 tsp Vitamin E (try and get a body oil that has vitamin E if not buy and open some vitamin E capsules and mix them in)

I used the house brand of Sugar in the Raw, Turbinado brown sugar because I liked the texture better, it wasn’t as fine as other brown sugar and offered a more crystalized rub, like salt scrubs. Since it’s winter and my skin can get dry I wanted something that would help add moisture. I also wanted a sugar scrub instead of a salt scrub because it is more like a polish but I got the best of both worlds using the Turbinado sugar.

For the coffee grinds I substituted some instant coffee (some vanilla latte or something) I had left over from when my mother visited last fall. I don’t make coffee at home so it was an added saved expense to use what was in my cupboard. I added the coffee because the caffeine is supposed to be good for cells and awakening them and  even fighting/preventing cellulite.

I used regular cooking vanilla for a scent instead of essential oil b/c all of the essential oil I wanted were pretty expensive (um like forty bucks for tiiiiiny thing). And thinking about it I’m looking for function not another girly smell for my man-filled bathroom (did I mention I live with four guys?).

Looking back next time I will probably not add the vanilla or add more since the scent didn’t really come through, but again, I’m looking for function not girly smell. Also, I used a coconut scented almond oil so adding the vanilla didn’t really seem necessary. I will probably also add more coffee next time, which I would recommend if you want more of a coffee aroma.

Lastly, after using it in the shower before shaving I also used the exfoliant on my lips! Best tasting exfoliant ever! The dry wind and horrible east coast winter weather really does a number on your lips and skin. This totally helped! My legs felt smoother, lips smoother (and sexier) and overall I am happy with my homemade sugar scrub!

Use it in the shower before your next date or for yourself to help make your legs feel sexier!


Will user-based internet and overcharge fees really affect consumer behavior?

This week Canada reconsidered usage-based billing for internet users.

I had two reactions:

1. America, please don’t do this.

2. Canadian Radio-television and Telecommunications Commission chairman Konrad von Finckenstein has a point.

“We are convinced that Internet services are no different than other public utilities, and the vast majority of Internet users should not be asked to subsidize a small minority of heavy users,” the CRTC chair argued.

“For us, it is a question of fundamental fairness. Let me restate: ordinary users should not be forced to subsidize heavy users,” von Finckenstein said in a statement.

Now, the economist in me agrees with the statement and I don’t think I should have to pay for heavy internet users to have their services subsidized. My only question is: what kind of internet user am I?

I’m interested to see how this plays out and if this new policy actually affects user behavior. Stay tuned!

Funny undeniable adult truths. There are a few different versions out there, so here’s the list I complied.

It’s pretty funny and should put a smile on your face! Enjoy!!

I love Betty White.

1. I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I’m pretty sure
I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the
person died.

9. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work
when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for the
rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don’t
want to have to restart my collection…again.

13. I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if
I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I
did not make any changes to.

14. “Do not machine wash or tumble dry” means I will never wash this– ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello, Hello, **it!!), but when I immediately call back it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

17. I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

20. I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.

21. Sometimes I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.

22. I would rather carry ten over-loaded plastic bags in each hand than take two trips to bring my groceries in.

23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m finished with a text.

24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

25. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?

26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.

28. Is it just me or do high school students get dumber each year?

29. There’s no worse feeling than that millisecond you’re sure you’re going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation I hate bicyclists.

31. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

33. The first testicular guard, the “Cup,” was used in Hockey in 1874 and
the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for
men to realize that their brain is also important.

Can you find love in a coffee shop?

Ad Kahlua, stir. Find love.

I know some people enjoy coffee dates because they feel there is less pressure, but um, really, I am not 45.

I recently had a guy ask me out for coffee after I specifically said I don’t really drink coffee. Admittingly, I may have to adjust this self-proclaimed ‘I don’t drink coffee’ after I’ve discovered numerous flavored lattes at Starbucks. BUT I said I don’t really drink coffee. The last time I said that to a guy, the-jerk-he-turned-out-to-be-lying-and saying-he-slept-with-me-when-he-never-got-more-than-a-kiss, at least then suggested we get smoothies.

What does a girl think of when she thinks of a date? I will tell you right now she is NOT picturing a coffee shop. My time is valuable. I want to go out to new restaurants and try new things and if I am scheduling someone I am not even sure I’m into for a date into my hectic schedule, you can bet your allowance it is not going to be for coffee. Maybe I’m old-fashioned, but I believe alcoholic beverages are an important part of a date.

Coffee just has so much more of an interview feeling for me. Also, it’s hard to get dressed up cute for a coffee shop, almost in a sad way, like why are you dressing up for the library? Coffee shops mostly remind me of doing work and studying, not a place where I flirt and am making a conscious effort to look cute. (Okay, maybe I should change my preconceived notion of coffee expectations, sure meeting the love of my life in a coffee shop probably has the same statistical probabilities as meeting them in a bar, and I’ve definitely met a love in a bar.)

Also, what kind of listener are you when I tell you I don’t really drink coffee and still ask me out for a coffee date?! Over the years I’ve learned to see signs of men who are horrible at being on my side and listening. So if you can’t even listen to me for a first date suggestion, what makes me think you are going to listen to me about the really important things?

So there, you are not a really good listener and maybe you should be more creative than coffee (um like pomegranate martinis) for a first date.

Bottom line: It’s not rocket science. Guys if you want to stand out, do something creative for a first date. Even if you are doing the same creative thing for ten first dates. And if a girl tells you she’s not into something, LISTEN.


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February 2011
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